Walking With Coyote

Stretching hugely, Masha reaches her arms up and pushes against the headboard, pointing her toes, her whole body quivering before releasing the stretch, a satisfying lassitude filling her as a result. She aches all over, but not unpleasantly except for a large bruise on her shoulder, a slight throb at the back of her head from the healing wound, and another intense bruise at the back of her thigh. She moves her palms to her cheek and finds no sign of the scabs and relief washes through her. Slowly opening her eyes, Masha sits up and swings her legs over the side of the bed, blinking as she takes in the state of her flat, her nose wrinkling at the stale smells of blood and sweat, pervasive even with the open window. She twists to look at her thigh and snorts, recognizing the mark of a hastily slammed tranqualizer dart and offers a prayer of thanks to the good god for trusted friends.

She rises and pads about, tidying up, opening the other windows before scrubbing the sofa fabric, vacuuming the carpet and changing the bedclothes, stuffing the soiled linens in a sack for later washing at the basement laundry. Gathering her shower things, she heads down the hall, throwing away the shredded, salt stiffened clothing enroute. Feeling clean and restored, hair painstakingly combed, she returns to her flat and puts on her comfy flannels before opening her safe to withdraw her journal. Settling on her favorite sofa with a cigar and whiskey at hand to write out what she remembers of recent events, Masha feels oddly at peace.

"I must remember that sometimes, Les Mysteres take us at our word. I wanted to know more of these coyote gifts, and I have been given just that. Oddly, not from the Pack, which I left a few days back, with some regret. As I told Aidann, I just do not fit there. Everyone is absorbed in their own affairs and seemed to have very little time for me and I felt very alone and lonely, very at odds with Aidann's description of family. No matter where I go or who I affiliate with, the Sarcina are my family in Midian, those who have left and those who remain. So when Chi asked me to come to Bangkok to help with something going on with Pera, I left the aftermath of Rena's new placement fight where she did beautifully, all grace and ferocity against the oiled machine that is our Bekah.

"It is confusing, but suffice to say, I now believe that vampires are not of the dead, for how else do I explain the willingness of Ezili Freda Dahomey to horse Pera who herself is, to my surprise, a vampire? I know this only because she bit me as Ezili took possession of her body in order to save her from some other presence, not one of the lwa, but somehow still with ties to ancient Africa, a male presence that is unlike any of those I know and honor in Vodou.

"It seems the virus that Tres manufactured is rampant through Midian and that bite infected me. I lay in my flat for several days, succumbing to the virus, having bizarre and vivid dreams, some of which make me blush to even think about. I also have a firm belief now that the coyote who bit me? He was indeed a gift from Papa Legba and oh my, can a person lose her virginity in a dream and stay a virgin?

"But I digress. Things are much blurred. I remember hunting food and the enormous satisfaction of securing the rabbit that was my intended dinner. I ripped its throat out and ate its flesh and lapped up its blood and it was utterly pure and fine and wholesome. Just writing that seems so strange, but it was like when we sacrifice chicken or bulls to the lwa - a sacred thing, with the offering made and all of the flesh used towards food. That it tasted so good raw makes me feel ill to think of now, but is that not what the wild is about? As much as I adore cooking, it is fascinating to realize that the menu provided for nature by nature is just as wholesome in a very strange way. I remember feeling an odd love for that plump little rabbit, that it would honor me with the joy of the hunt, the thrill of the chase, and the inevitable offering of its life to sustain my own needs. I have much to ponder about this.

"I remember napping for a bit hidden in a sheltered area of the ruins, then returning to the park still nice and full but wanting to explore. Then I started encountering peoples and their own antagonism and disrespect seemed to trigger an anger in me, a rage that slowly built. I remember a man that smelled like oil and blood and the sting of gunpowder and his voice was like nails on a chalkboard and I ran into the city. I remember gazing into the Pool Hall where there were many gathered - I think I was looking for peoples I knew, that I felt safe among? But none were there and I trotted towards the Twilight Zone where a man and a woman moved in such tempting ways that all I could do was chase her.

"Then it was all aggression and fighting and such fury that I have never felt before. I was possessed by the it, not like with the lwa where I am safe, but consumed like a parasite. I know now that it was the virus, first causing me to be "feral" as the nekos call it then triggering such violence from me. It was no longer about hunger. I just wanted to hurt those who saw me as a threat and I was like a wild thing, clawing and snapping and snarling and biting and I felt no pain, no matter what my targets did but something finally gave and I remember just falling to the floor of the Zone, barely able to move. Then nausea and horrible retching and the taste of iron laced blood in my mouth and nose, then nothing.

"The next I recall, Chi and Rena were standing over me and I was suddenly panicked. They had found me in the strange machine place that the biomechanical peoples of Midian called home although I have no notion how I got there. Chi had given me the antivirus, thank the good god, and Rena told me to go and wash in the ocean as the blood from my body could contaminate others. I did this, swiimming in my shredded clothes, still feeling so odd and quivering, like I was only barely in charge, like my teeth could become sharp if I only willed it so.

"I met Rena back at the Zone and she gave me some of her own clothing to wear and then gave me a hug now that I was clean. She is so dear to me and I almost forgot, she asked me to be maid of honor at her wedding. How about that, eh? Anyhow, I was scared and surprised to find that she smelled not just like her normal Rena scent, but like food. Yes, food, and tasty food and that truly frightened me. Rabbits, but not peoples!

"She suggested we go to find Mitz who had gotten contaminated by my blood, saying Chi had gone ahead and I thought that seemed like a good plan, you know? So we went, encountering Paris along the way and some strange scruffy looking man. I had to struggle again with wanting to attack them like a coyote, because Paris, well, Rena told me SHE was the one to hurt her that time, to take her tail away. I just wanted to leap on her and rip her throat out. It was quite daunting to have to struggle with such an urge, but I managed, and followed Rena towards the metro.

"There, I smelled Chi but worse, I smelled the scent of the man who had hurt me before at the Twilight Zone and all I remember is a sense of righteous fury. I followed his scent as clearly as if it were a breadcrumb trail and it was this perfect song of focus, with his back to me and I remembering just leaping towards him. Then I remember pain in my shoulder, and another sharp stabbing pain in my thigh, then nothing more. I suspect Rena took matters into hand and used her dart on me, and thank goodness, for I do not want to find that I have eaten a person, even if he DID hurt me.

"I need to find out what happened to Pera and Mitz and see that they are well."

Masha closes the little book and restores it to her safe, locking it tight, before heading down to wash the linens and Rena's clothes, still in her flannels. Some things couldn't wait.